Ah, April Fools’ Day: Google is now Topeka, the excellent webcomic xkcd goes terminal, and my college announced that next year the campus will be dry (this was especially well-played because alcohol policy was in the process of being changed only yesterday). Among all these April 1st shenanigans, the 2010 New York International Auto Show pressed on, with its usual stock of interesting reveals (which I shall definitely be covering in the coming week). Toyota, however, decided that it would be the perfect day to launch two new video ad campaigns in order to increase attention for new models in its subsidiary brands. Oh, they got my attention alright…

BMW Lexus Films

Does anyone remember when BMW released that phenomenal set of eight short films in a series called The Hire from 2001 to 2002? If not, a brief synopsis is in order: Clive Owen played a wheelman known as “The Driver,” who takes on various risky driving-related missions. As well as being highly entertaining, these videos showcased BMW’s strong lineup at the time, including its M-model lineup. The series was an enormous viral success and helped boost BMW sales numbers that year. Today, nearly nine years later, Lexus announced a series of their own videos centered around the upcoming CT200h hatchback. And thus the first red flag was raised.

The CT200h?, I thought, That’s a luxo-economy car, isn’t it? It is. Powered by a 1.8L inline-4, the CT200h is expected to produce less than 200 horsepower. It’s also front wheel drive and has an eCVT transmission. What’s that you say? This powertrain configuration cannot possibly be fun? I agree, that’s what it sounds like to me, too. However, Lexus doesn’t think so. Watch this teaser to see what I mean:

Lexus’ new series, which apparently is set to launch on May 13th, 2010, is called Dark Ride. The name stinks of low-grade sci-fi, does it not? Anyway, this is what I’ve gathered from watching this: Lexus has made a BMW Films clone using a car that will be plagued by tremendous understeer and a 0-60 time that will be lucky if it sees the low 9-second range. As my friend accurately pointed out while watching this video, you never actually see the thing accelerate from a dig. I’m guessing that’s because no filmmaker could shoulder the impossible task of making Prius-like acceleration footage look action-packed. I don’t blame them.

Reinvent The Whiff

Swing and a massive miss, Toyota. In order to attempt to raise the hype of its new models, Scion’s advertising department has begun airing a series of episodes called Reinvent The Wheels on YouTube. A bastardly hybrid of MTV’s Pimp My Ride and the generic “contestant presents to a panel of judges” reality show model, Reinvent The Wheels pits a group of “design professionals” (the likes of which are pastry chefs, DJs, and special effect artists for independent films) against each other in a competition to see who can each best customize one car from Scion’s new, desperate line of vehicles. Of course, as you probably expected, the designs concepts shown in the first episode (all I needed to watch to get the point) are hilariously atrocious. Video literally speaks louder than text, though, so watch this:

It cannot possibly be anything but a lose-lose situation: either it’s acting so bad that it’s actually NOT funny, or these are real people. For the entire world’s sake, I’d really hope for the former.

The Real Joke

APRIL FOOLS! …I wish. But it’s no joke. There are no intentional lulz to be had here: Toyota’s marketing department is really, actually determined to use these campaigns to help their sales. In the case of the Lexus series, Dark Ride, it seems the goal is to capture a younger, more “sporty” demographic using some weird footage of a gilded economy car. With the Reinvent The Wheels campaign, Scion is trying to flout its apparent customizability to even more tasteless youths than before.

You know what the real joke is here? It’s probably going to work.

Storylines. If I had to pick one reason why I enjoy watching endurance races more than any other types, it’s the fact that there are so many different “stories” occurring at any given moment during the race. Such was the case at the 58th running of 12 Hours of Sebring, the grand opening to the 2010 American Le Mans Series.

Before I go into talking about this race, though, I have some definite explaining to do. No, your RSS reader is not broken, and no, I haven’t been posting to a secret part of this site: the date of the last post I made is indeed August 9, 2009. Sad thing, isn’t it? Well, I’m back now, and I have new plans and ideas for Ignition Unlimited. Believe it or not, I’ve even convinced a guest writer to occasionally drop some content on here! Amazing! I’ll go into detail about the future of IU later, because now, it’s time to talk about Sebring.

Changes

Going into my second year of following this race, I knew what to expect but I didn’t know exactly how the 2010 12 Hours would differ from the 2009 race. My first answer came from glancing at the entry list every once in a while starting months before this race: it became clear that the Peugeot vs. Audi fight was over for this year, at least at Sebring, as Audi was nowhere to be found. Although Peugeot was to be the only diesel running there, new regulations put higher limitations on diesels in order to make the competition between them and petrol-powered prototypes more fair. This was evident, to a degree, as I’ll discuss later. Another change was Highcroft Racing: last year’s favorite for the whole ALMS Season, Patrón-Highcroft Racing ditched their P1 Acura ARX-02a for a modified P2 ARX-01c, a change that surprised me until I found out that the Prototype classes were to be merged for the 2010 ALMS Season. Like Corvette Racing (who transferred last season from GT1 to GT2), it seems Highcroft is in search of a greater degree of competition. Speaking of classes, there were five at this race: Prototype 1 (where you have your diesel Peugeots, a Lola run by Aston Martin, and others), Prototype 2 (the class of the aforementioned Patrón-Highcroft Acura team, a Porsche RS Spyder and one other), LMP Challenge (a new class of single-make/model racing using Chevy-powered Oreca FLM09 cars), GT2 (the biggest factory-backed class, featuring BMWs, Ferraris, Porsches, Fords, and more) and GT Challenge (the Porsche 911 GT3 Cup class).

The Storylines Of Sebring

Unlike last year, when the main event was an epic Audi-Peugeot face-off, this year’s Sebring 12 Hours was characterized by many little events that led to a fairly unsurprising end result. Since there were so many, it’s time for–yep, you guessed it–IU Bulletpoints… with video!*

• First Few Hours
  The beginning of this race was amazing, and I’m not sugar coating that at all. Really. Tons of passing action from all classes, coupled with the great fighting from LMP1 (yeah, believe it or not, the non-diesel P1 cars could stand a chance against the Peugeots) and GT2. Video speaks louder than words, though, so check this out. And don’t act like you’re not impressed. I couldn’t imagine why any woman in the world could resist Emanuele Pirro (green Lola-Judd with the British flag on the rear) after that insane pass, not to mention he also had a better single-best-lap time than the winning Peugeot.

• The Harsh Reality
  Sometimes things just go wrong. If your race comes to an end three-quarters of a lap in, and it’s the car’s fault, well, that’s what you call a bad day. Unfortunately, such was the case for Autocon Racing, Jaguar Racing, and Drayson Racing. All of these teams had catastrophic mechanical issues either at or very close to the beginning of the race. Although Drayson partially recovered after their Lola-Judd’s alternator decided to take a permanent vacation, both Autocon and Jaguar were both out for good. The real heartbreaker was Jaguar, though: on only the first lap, a cylinder head cracked and ended their day. It’s really too bad to see that happen to a fledgling team, but the reality is harsh: shit happens.
• There’s A Reason Why It’s Called “Endurance Racing” – Part 1: Cars
  Think about it: you have a piece of expensive, well designed machinery running at maximum capacity for 12 hours straight. You’d figure something always has to wrong, right? Well, miraculously, some cars never do run into problems, but all the others… yeah. A few instances of this notably stood out in this year’s Sebring 12 Hours. One of my favorite teams, Patrón-Highcroft Racing, had a little electrical problem in the cockpit of their Acura ARX-01c that turned into an issue that cost them 24 minutes of driving time (they were penalized for having too many crew members working on it over the pit wall) and therefore a first-place finish. Patrón Racing’s Ferrari F430 GT also suffered a slight issue while in the hands of its owner, Scott Sharp. It sort of lit on fire. See for yourself in the video below.

• There’s A Reason Why It’s Called “Endurance Racing” – Part 2: People
  If something doesn’t go wrong with the car, something can definitely go wrong with that fire-retardant-nylon-wearing mush of organic material that plops into the carbon fiber bucket seat for each stint. Yeah, you read that right, ladies and gentlemen: humans make mistakes while racing! It’s understandable, however: the cars are hard to drive (even for one lap, let alone all 12 hours), it’s physically uncomfortable (a driver had to receive medical attention for overheating while in a closed-cockpit car), and it’s tiring. The biggest failure of the day, though, was obvious: Corvette Racing’s pit crew. I’ll let the video do the talking; it was a mistake that cost them the race, needless to say. And, oh yeah, Team Falken Tire’s pit crew should probably make sure all the center-locking lugs on all four wheels are completely tight before letting their Porsche 911 GT3 RSR leave the pits (yeah, yeah, I know the axle end was broken, but they shouldn’t just be sticking a rim on there and praying that it’ll stay).

• The Results
  I’ll be bold with this: compared to last year, the end of the 2010 Sebring 12 Hours was boring. The P1 class was won undisputedly by Peugeot’s 908 HDI. P2 was slightly more interesting, with a 1st place finish from the independent Team Cytosport running a Porsche RS Spyder. Risi Competizione’s Ferrari F430 GT won GT2, and, oh, Level 5 Motorsports won LMPC and an Alex Job Racing Porsche 911 GT3 Cup won GTC (for some reason I can’t seem to get excited about the Challenge classes).

• Odds And Ends
  There were a few other events of note on Sebring day. The two best came afterwards. Firstly, one of the winning Peugeot drivers, Alex Wurz, dropped a sweet F-Bomb during a live interview on Speed TV’s post-race coverage. Secondly, Radio Le Mans announced that Wolfgang Ullrich, Audi Team Joest’s head honcho, had been spotted multiple time throughout the day, in the stands and in the pits, observing the competition carefully. This is because, for the past week, Audi’s new car (the R15 Plus; don’t worry, I’m covering that soon), its crew and its drivers were at Homestead Speedway doing high-speed testing, and starting today, Audi was at Sebring attempting to beat the P1 lap times set during the Sebring 12 Hours. After a disappointing loss last year, Audi’s sights are now set firmly on the top of the podium at Le Mans.

The End Of The Beginning

Thus ends the 2010 12 Hours of Sebring. This exciting prologue is making it look like the beginnings of an excellent American Le Mans Series Season. I will again follow all 24 of the Hours of Le Mans on June 12th, and I will also be returning to the Northeast Grand Prix at Lime Rock Park on July 25th. It’s race time.

* Videos courtesy of MT89Motorsport’s Youtube Channel. These are awesome, thanks!

Yeah, yeah, I know this game came out in November of 2008, and that it’s almost a whole year later, AND that Need For Speed: Shift is coming out in slightly over a month, but I still feel the need to give a commentary on this game. Until I saw the light of games like DiRT, Test Drive Unlimited, and Forza Motorsport 2, I was a big Need For Speed fan.

Need For Speed: Most Wanted was (and still is) one of the greatest “arcadey” racing games ever made (those police chases almost become zombie-horror-survival-esque with their one-versus-infinite feel), so it was natural for EA: Blackbox to try to replicate that feel after two games that didn’t do so well (Carbon and ProStreet). Did they succeed? Read on to find out.

A Failed Attempt?

Indeed. Most Wanted‘s concept worked wonders the first time. Carbon was an undeniable flop of a game. ProStreet was a completely different breed of game (a faux-sim, if you will), so it doesn’t count, although EA’s CEO John Riccitiello thinks it’s comparable:

I thought it [Pro Street] was an okay game, in terms of gameplay. It’s not good… …Undercover will be a much better game.

Wrong you are, John, because Undercover is pretty damn poor. I know I enjoyed ProStreet, which I traded in to get Undercover, a lot more. It’s a better game overall, because it’s not trying to be Most Wanted; it’s original. Enough about comparisons between the Need For Speed games… time to talk about Undercover by itself.

The Good

I’m starting with the good so you can see that I just don’t blindly hate this game, and because there is actually a surprising amount of good in this game (just not right stuff, unfortunately). The map, Tri-City, is colossal. It’s got 109 miles of roadway, which only loses to Test Drive Unlimited out of the games I’ve played. The map has more than enough polygons, as to not have the jarring “ride” of TDU, and they manage to make the visuals of a moderately boring desert-combined-with-coastal-town (yeah, I was confused too) quite beautiful with the lighting and shaders the game’s graphics engine employs. Speaking of the graphics, the cars look absolutely amazing as well. The paint shades look excellent and you can definitely and easily distinguish between the finishes available for the paints (see my matte black Veyron as an example, although excuse the poor quality of the image). The attention to detail is also excellent, except when the cars get damaged, in which case the damage looks rather generic and it’s not exact (for instance, swipe the left front quarter panel only and the whole front bumper appears scratched).

Then comes the car list, which I personally think is the best they’ve had in a Need For Speed yet. You’ve got everything from the old Corvette Stingray to the Bugatti Veyron, including a little personal favorite of mine, the Volkswagen R32 (again, see my image below). Europe, Asia, and America are all represented, although the representation from Asia could be a little bit stronger. At least they have the R35 GT-R.

The last good thing about the game I’d like to touch on briefly is the soundtrack. Every Need For Speed has had at least a few good songs on its soundtrack (well, except Carbon maybe), but this one definitely takes the cake. As well as representing very well-known names such as Justice, Nine Inch Nails, and The Whip, Undercover features some interesting and fun tracks from slightly less mainstream bands and artists such as Ladytron, Ojos De Brujo, The Pinker Tones, Mindless Self Indulgence, and The Fashion. I have not yet switched to my own music streaming from my iTunes Library while playing this game, which is something I usually find myself doing fairly quickly with Need For Speed titles. Hell, it’s actually an iPod-worthy soundtrack.

The Bad… Uh-Oh

Oh boy. Here it comes. I actually don’t even know where to start. Factual inaccuracies? Good idea.

And yes, as a disclaimer to possible fanboys, I know this game isn’t a sim, but damn, these errors are truly unforgiveable. Here are a few, NOT ALL, by any means, but a few:

• Possibly a deliberate error, the pricing of cars in this game is ridiculous. A Nissan GT-R is $225k while the Veyron is $325k, and an Audi S5 is $115k.
• It is commonly known fact that the Lamborgini Gallardo LP560-4 and the Audi R8 are very, very closely related and that the Gallardo is the better performing of the two by a considerable margin. Why, then, is the Gallardo less expensive and in a lower performance tier than the R8 in Undercover?
• The Veyron is a tank, weighing in at over 4000 lbs. How can a police-equipped Porsche 911 Turbo (with a very heavily rear-biased weight of 3500 lbs) perform a PIT maneuver on a car with a mid-mounted W16?
• The A.I. in this game can handle a car on the highway at 200 MPH like doing a slalom on foot. No human will ever have such reflex. They also can spin you out with great ease, like the police, but if you try to do the same to them, it’s like hitting a brick wall.

As you can see, this Undercover has absolutely zero regard for physics, and this becomes even more apparent as you progress through the game, unlocking cars that handle better and upgrade parts to increase handling even further. I was at Lime Rock a few weeks ago (yes, I know, I know, a post about that is STILL in order), and I watched as the Acura LMP1 car tore through corners at over 80 miles per hour with complete control. This morning in Undercover, I took a hairpin turn in the Veyron (which, if I may point out, is not a stellar car for insane handling) at 160 miles per hour, flat out, no brakes, nothing, and did it cleanly, too. Seriously, what were they thinking?

It’s clear that they tried to mimic Most Wanted, but they honestly could not have made the game look more like it AND be less like it. The same feeling of “Oh damn, I gotta escape!” is not there during cop chases, the A.I. make the races extremely annoying, and the plot is more or less the equivalent of mixing 2 Fast 2 Furious and The Transporter. No, seriously, that’s actually what they were shooting for:

Undercover, according to Riccitiello, is instead taking cues from action films. “For those of you who ever saw movies like The Transporter – it’s sort of a cult classic among people with a B-movie mentality, which fits me perfectly,” he said.

My Final Verdict

Well, Mr. Riccitiello, The Transporter may be a B-Movie and fits you well, but Undercover is really a D-Game and doesn’t fit me at all. I was hoping so much for a newer, better Most Wanted, and this is the mess I get instead? Really?

For pretending to be Most Wanted, and of course, failing, I give Need For Speed: Undercover an Ignition Unlimited Media Rating of 3/10.

Ah, The Fast And The Furious trilogy quadrilogy: the single biggest butt of jokes in the history of car movies. The first, The Fast And The Furious, was possibly the largest impetus to the rise of ricers; the second, 2 Fast 2 Furious, was a terrible, terrible movie with a dry, boring plot and horrifyingly gross cars; the third, The Fast And The Furious: Tokyo Drift was an interesting spin on things and possibly the best of the bunch (although that’s not really saying much). When I heard there was a fourth one coming, and that it would restore the cast of the original movie, I was wondering if they were attempting to redeem the sorry series with a retry of the original. Despite this, I wasn’t expecting much, as it is still part of the F&F series. Well, this past weekend I went to see Fast And Furious, and it was not exactly what I expected…

My Thoughts

Alright, I’ll go right out with it: I was expecting bad, but this was absolutely horrible. I don’t even know where to start, but I guess I’ll begin with the plot. It seems as if they took the plot from the second movie, nearly exactly, and swapped out some characters, cars, and objectives. Yeah, that’s right, the second movie. The worst one. Needless to say, the acting is horrible, with stellar, over-the-top performances from Vin Diesel and Paul Walker. The minor characters were acted stereotypically and in a way so easy to guess, I had the movie figured out literally twenty minutes in.

The Fast And The Furious series is about street racing, right? Well there’s ONE main race, and it’s unrealistic and packed to the brim with CG and corny drifts. It also featured what would be the coolest navigation system ever – if it existed, and furthermore, didn’t look like something out of Star Wars.

And now, the cars. Oh, this is going to be fun. Well, it’s the second movie all over again: riced imports against old muscle that border on tasteless. I had an admittedly hard time keeping myself from cracking up at a scene I know should have been 100% serious: a certain funeral (I’m giving no spoilers) sees a group of ricers’ racers cars parked along a cemetary road, sporting their oversized wings and wheels. It was almost insulting.

Paul Walker is given the choice of any import on the city’s impound lot to use in his undercover mission, and after filtering through plenty of rice but also legitimately awesome cars such as the Honda S2000 and the new Nissan GT-R, he goes with a cool yet horrifyingly outdated (and overused in this series) Nissan Skyline GT-R R34, only to tune it exactly how he does in the second movie. Boring. Vin Diesel’s got yet more old-school muscle, both a Chevelle SS and the same Charger from the first movie. Boring again. Later in the movie, Diesel and Walker steal a riced 2008 Subaru Impreza WRX STI from the impound lot. That should really please the Subaru fans who saw this.

Ok, ok, there were some good cars as well, but let me make this point: they do NOT, in any way, redeem this movie, especially because most of them are only featured for a few seconds, tops. A black Buick Regal GNX plays a fairly integral part for the first five minutes, then disappears entirely for the rest of the movie. The best part of the movie only lasts for about five seconds, though: a white, rally-tuned Ford Escort Cosworth RS shows itself, light rack and all, at the beginning of some miscellaneous drag race. At the very end of the movie, the audience is slightly rewarded (like I said, nothing redeems the rest of the movie) with seeing Jordana Brewster driving a JDM-spec Honda NSX-R. Finally, there’s some Porsche Cayman which I guess could be considered cool. Overall though, in terms of cars, I was left far short of impressed.

Conclusion

I wanted to give Fast And Furious a chance. I really did. I heard it was the best of the series, and after Tokyo Drift, I was convinced that the people responsible for this movie had what it takes to make a good movie. Sadly, no. The fourth movie in this series is a tremendous failure, bringing back the same things that ruined the second movies. I’ll give this an Ignition Unlimited Media Rating of 3 out of 10. If you haven’t seen it yet, don’t. Wait until DVD to see it, if ever.

Recently I started following the American Le Mans Series. As I wrote in my post about the 12 Hours of Sebring, I was amazed by the vigor and skill required in this sort of racing… but I had no idea what really goes into this, until now. Originally aired during prime time on ESPN a day before Sebring, Audi’s documentary Truth In 24 highlights the legendary victory of Audi over Peugeot in the 2008 24 Hours of Le Mans in a seemingly impossible battle. This film, narrated by Jason Statham, is truly an epic and definitely the most engaging documentary I’ve ever seen. For more of my thoughts on it, continue on into the post.

My Thoughts

Audi’s story is a truly remarkable one: the rise of a true competitor for their aging R10 TDI provided an intense challenge that, throughout most of the 2008 season, got the best of them, leaving Peugeot in the lead. Le Mans proved to be race that required every single member of Team Joest to be on its toes for the entirety of the full-day-long test. The documentary captures this in complete brilliance. As said early in the movie, it’s no easy task to translate the feel of Le Mans onto a screen, but somehow they’ve done it. I felt all the disappointment, the joy, the adrenaline, and the chills of this race. The best part, or at least my favorite, is when Allan McNish gives his accelerated walkthrough of the Circuit De La Sarthe, naming the gears and corner cambers from memory. When he’s done, he just sits there for a moment, reminiscing. It’s truly moving.

All in all, I’ll give this an Ignition Unlimited Media Rating of 10 out of 10. There is truly not a single undesirable thing about it: from the action, to the interviews, to Jason Statham’s gruff narration, and to the story itself, Truth In 24 is a gem unlike any other I’ve seen.

Truth In 24 is available for download for free from the iTunes Store. You can get it from here.

Ending late last night, the 2009 12 Hours Of Sebring endurance race was won by Audi’s new R15 TDI with a slight 22-second margin over Peugot’s 908 HDI FAP. This was the first endurance race that I have ever followed (at least in periods), and I couldn’t have asked for a better one to watch. I have to concede, I was only really paying attention to the LMP1 and LMP2 classes, as this is where the clear competition was. Some of my observed highlights and more photos of the cars come after the jump, but, wow, what a race this was. I can’t stress that enough.

Truth In Truth In Engineering

True to their engineering excellence, Audi’s two R15 cars did not suffer any mechanical or electrical issues throughout the course of the entire race, and only made routine fueling and tire pit stops. If I had to state reasons why I think #2 R15 TDI won this, I’d have to go with a) this brilliant reliability and b) some of the various pitting strategies used in the last hour of the race, especially that quick, ten-second stop for a shot of fuel… oh, and also Allan McNish. Pulling out the fastest R15 lap of the race of during his last period in the car, and at night? Wow. One of #2 R15′s other drivers, Tom Kristensen, has the honor of calling this victory his fifth at Sebring, making him the winningest driver ever at Sebring. Amazing driving.

There Can Only Be One

Where there are winners, there must be losers. Unfortunately for Peugeot and Acura, things didn’t work out well enough to let them come out on top. Peugeot’s #08 908 HDi FAP, while in the hands of Stephane Sarrazin was shockingly close, but not close enough to the winning Audi, despite being ahead for the majority of the 12 hours. Peugeot’s other 908 had air conditioning problems near the beginning of the race, almost immediately putting it out of the running for the LMP1 class. Later, a slow puncture further hampered Peugeot’s efforts, yet they still managed to stay less than one lap behind or in front of Audi for the entire race. Acura did do well in the LMP2 class by default, winning because there were no other finishers; however, LMP1 for Acura didn’t go as planned. The full 12-hour debut of the Acura ARX-02a was cut short due to a suspension issue, and even if the car had been in for the entire time, it never could have kept up with the diesels.

Diesel Reigns Supreme

It’s clear that in the LMP1 class, fielding a diesel car is the only way to win. If less pit stops and more torque aren’t reason enough to do so, maybe the fact that development of the technology can be further applied in the consumer market is. For the rest of the American Le Mans Series, I have a feeling that this will become more and more painstakingly obvious to Acura. There really is something to be said about diesels, though: the slow, smokey, noisy diesels of the past are no more. Too bad the United States is just starting to figure that out, if at all. Expect another diesel-related post in a short time.